Easy Crock Pot Chicken Noodle Soup (Unless You Do Something Dumb Like Me…)

Umm… lets see…  how can a person take a ridiculously simple recipe and make it take hours longer than it should?  Easy…  just try making noodles and neglect to roll them out as thin as you’re supposed to!

In the end – this was DELICIOUS.  And I will be doing it again.  And I will be rolling out my noodles thinner.  Or maybe I’ll cheat and buy premade ones…  Only time will tell!  One thing’s for certain, I won’t make that same mistake again!

Here’s how it goes:

1. Wake up late.
2. Open Freezer and identify a double pack of chicken thighs (~6lbs total).
3. Stand in kitchen and start googling recipes.
4. Look at clock and realize you’re getting nowhere.
5. Open all the cabinets and fridge/freezer looking for hints.
6. Settle on the idea of chicken soup.
7. Grab an onion and chop it into smallish pieces. This was supposed to be a green onion, but it was roughly the size of a pool ball.
8. Rip open chicken packages and toss them in the crockpot.
9. Realize that the chicken still has the paper attached to it to absorb liquids and pull it back out of the crock pot.
10. Remove said paper and put it back in the crock pot.
11. Look at clock, curse.
12. Empty whats left in of the chicken stock into the crockpot. 
13. Curse. Grab bouillion and throw it in, no measurements. Probably a good 3-4 heaping spoonfuls. 
14. Open the fridge and curse again that you don’t have any carrots. 
15. Slam fridge door shut. 
16. Remember that you have julienne carrots for salads and retrieve them. Dump in 1/2 the bag or more.
17. Add water to fill the crockpot until the 2 still-frozen rectangles of chicken thighs are covered with water.
18. Open spice cabinet.
19. Stare hoping an answer will materialize.
20. Give up – put in a couple small handfuls of salt, a decent bit of italian seasonings, a little bit of garlic powder.
21. Close cabinet. 
22. Open cabinet, retrieve black pepper, intend to only put a little in but the lid busts open and dumps a TON.
23. Curse.
24. Grab a measuring cup and remove the vast majority of the pepper that thankfully was still floating.
25. Turn crockpot on high for 10 hours.
26. Go to work.
27. Go shopping.
28. Come home 12 hours later to a delicious smelling house.
29. Start boiling water with some boillion in it for the noodles.
30. Make dough for noodles — 2 cups flour and 4 eggs. 
31. Let Averie do the measuring and turn on the mixer.
32. Clean up the flour from all over the house while Averie insists on eating it and telling me it’s delicious. (mixer still going)
33. Pick up crying child off floor and relocate her to the couch where she can sit and be mad that I cleaned up and threw away all of her ‘delicious flour’.
34. Turn off mixer.
35. Roll out dough as thin as you can. 
36. Keep rolling until it’s even thinner than you thought.
37. (Apparently still dont’ stop early enough…)
38. Use pizza cutter to cut dough. Let small child help.
39. Direct other half who has just arrived home from work to de-bone the chicken thighs and shred the meat.
40. Toss dough into boiling water.
41. Wait.
42. Wait.
43. Feed nearly raw dough to the other half, who loudly proclaims that it isn’t done yet.
44. Wait.
45. Wait.
46. Try feeding him more raw dough and receive the same response as the previous attempt.
47. Wait.
48. Wait. 
49. Receive lecture on not bringing him raw dough but instead cutting it open on the stovetop to check for doneness.
50. Wait.
51. Wait.
52. Reluctantly get up to check again and try his method.
53. Wait.
54. Check.
55. Wait.
56. Wait.
57. Curse at yourself for not rolling and cutting the dough thinner.
58. Wait.
59. Wait.
60. Check. Insert a side comment about how the dough would be thinner and alraedy cooked if we had the pasta attachment for the kitchenaid.
61. Wait.
62. Wait.
63. Check. Feed small child peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
64. Wait.
65. Wait.
66. Wait.
67. Wait.
68. Check. 
69. Put small child to bed.
70. Wait.
71. Check. Serve yourself and the other half a bowl of icecream for dinner.
72. Wait.
73. Wait. 
74. Wait.
75. Check.
76. Wait.
77. Say goodnight to the other half who says it should be done soon.
78. Wait.
79. Check.
80. Retrieve bowls.
81. Wait. 
82. Check and CELEBRATE with a little dance.
83. Strain noodles.
84. Dump noodles into crock pot.
85. Stir.
86. Use ladle to fill bowls.
87. Make sure to leave some inthe crock pot for sampling.
88. Close bowls.
89. Place in fridge.
90. Grab spoon.
91. Eat what’s left in the crock pot.
92. Rinse out crock pot.
93. Get on Facebook.

Wait, was that too complicated?

I guess you could always try the short version:

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